Seven Years of Joys and Challenges

Hillsdale United Methodist Church

Gary served seven years at Hillsdale UMC. It was a moderate sized church with a good mix of senior citizens and middle age adults, and enough young families to keep a youth group going. It was the largest town in a county of about 40,000, with a population of under 9,000. It was home to Hillsdale College, a conservative Liberal Arts college that did not accept Federal funding.

Scene from downtown Hillsdale looking east

Downtown Hillsdale, MI

Hillsdale, MI

Downtown Hillsdale

We were not used to being in a small town in a rural area. There were adjustments.

We had to go to Jackson or Adrian to see the movies we preferred, like Remains of the Day. After Walmart moved into the area, other smaller retailers closed. I had to leave town to buy many clothing items, shopping at Jackson, Adrian, and at an outlet mall in Indiana.

Doctors did not stick around very long. Our family doctor left his practice after a lawsuit, and we left the pediatrician because of his inappropriate behavior; he later lost his license.

At least there was a hospital in town, which proved important when our son developed pneumonia in the winter of 1990 when he was three years old. I was up all night with him, resorting to cold baths, but his fever would not go down. In the wee hours of the morning I woke Gary and we took Chris to the hospital, just at the end of our street.

He was hooked up to an IV and almost immediately felt better. He was hauling it around after him, unable to stay in bed. He shared a room with a toddler who was alone most of the day, except for visiting time when his entire family came and sat in the room talking to each other. Chris and I ‘adopted’ the boy. When he stuck his finger into an opening for medical equipment and couldn’t get it out, I alerted the nurses and Chris and I comforted him.

After one night staying in the hospital with Chris, sleeping on a chair, I developed a cough. I was diagnosed with bronchitis and sent home. Jean Elliot, Dorothy Lape, and other ladies from the church came to stay with Chris, singing him hymns and teaching him a prayer.

Chris was angry when we left the hospital without his roommate. He had always wanted a brother, and believed that we had gone to the hospital to bring that baby home.

I was aware how lucky we were that we had medical care to cure our son’s pneumonia, especially since Gary’s grandfather died of pneumonia in 1939.

Kite flying in the back yard

Sand box play

It was wonderful to have the open space for Chris to explore and play in. We found all kinds of critters in the yard to study, including peeper frogs, bunnies, deer, Milk Snakes, toads, and Praying Mantis. One year we found a cocoon and put it into a terrarium Chris bought at a garage sale. The next spring we watched the moth emerge.

Me with the moth

When we moved from Philly to Michigan we had to buy winter coats, boots, and heavy gloves!

Sledding in the back yard

Making snow men in the back yard

There were local parks and a rearing pond to explore. We saw fox and turtles and fish. One day a jet plane buzzed low over our heads! We don't know where he came from, but we could see his face in the window. Chris went to day camp at a nature center when he was older.

Chris and Gary

But the downside of the great outdoors was allergies. Just before my mother passed we learned that Chris had allergies to ragweed, tree pollen, and grass pollen. We were supposed to give Chris an allergy-free home, but the parsonage had no air conditioning. I went to the Trustee liason with a proposition: if they would pay half the cost of two air conditioner units, we would pay the other half and leave them when we moved. I was told that no one needed air conditioners in Michigan! Our son’s health concern made no difference. So we spent $1,000 we could not afford to buy window air conditioners on a credit card.

The first fall I joined the choir and handbell choir, led by Janet Lee who had taught music in Clawson, MI; she had replaced my high school choir teacher Denzel Balmer after she left the position. I found I could not deal with handbells. First, I was not used to counting. As a choral singer I read music and noted where I came in by the other parts. And in the small practice room, the sound hurt my ears! I have always had very sensitive hearing.

Janet Lee, me and Gary

I had to leave the choir after Chris was too old for nursery school so I could sit in church with him. But when the church held a Valentine concert talent show, Gary and I sang Do I Love You? from Fiddler on the Roof. We did a joint reading of Benjamin Bunny by Martin Bell, and I helped at other times with two-person scripture readings or story sermons.

Children stayed in worship service until the Children’s sermon, after which they left for Sunday School. That first Sunday when Chris was in worship and he saw his daddy walking down the aisle to the front of the church, Chris called out to Gary. He was very upset when his daddy ignored him, complaining and making a fuss. It took some time before Chris accepted that his daddy had a public role and could not be ‘daddy’ during that time. I kept Chris busy by drawing pictures, but he was bored. When the worship committee did a survey several people complained that the pastor’s kid was too distracting. It was a sign that there were communication problems in the church. People did not talk openly to solve issues, but 'gunny sacked' and nursed grudges. As Chris grew older, he started drawing cartoons based on our dog Kili. Kili the preacher. Kili the superhero.

The parsonage was a long, huge ranch. When we moved in we painted it, getting reimbursed for the cost of paint by the church, and wallpapered a kitchen wall. We had brought our portable dish washer from our Philadelphia home, as there was none in the parsonage, and also our new refrigerator since the parsonage one needed replacing. (Looking back, we had saved the church money and yet my request for help on the air conditioning was rejected!)

The linoleum kitchen floor was hopeless. Not only was it ugly, someone had scrubbed it with steel wool and it could not be waxed. When my mother-in-law came to visit, she tried to wax the floor again. It was hopeless. When our son dropped a strawberry on the floor, it left a permanent pink stain!

The detested kitchen floor!

I begged for a new kitchen floor every year. I even worked on their pride. I had joined a Great Books Club. We were reading the Norton Anthology of Short Stories. When I hosted the Club at the parsonage, I mentioned that all those Presbyterian Church and Hillsdale College members were going to see the horrid floor! To no avail. It was not replaced until right before they asked for a new pastor. The flooring I had chosen was installed in the large kitchen, the long hallway with laundry area and two closets, a half bath, and stairs for $800.

Meantime, the church had a beautiful, new fellowship room with a kitchen, grasscloth wall paper, and carpeting, because of a gift. It was nicer than the parsonage kitchen. A later gift was used to redecorate a Sunday School classroom used by the Fifth Grade class I was teaching. It was over-the-top, gaudy, and ornate because it the room was also used by bridal parties at weddings. 

The basement family room with my quilt space and a tv and play space

The church leader who had asked what I was going 'to do' at our meet and greet was still pressuring me on what to do. First, we joined their social group. They were older families with teenage kids and dual incomes. We didn’t have the money to go to Toledo for dinner and a show, and we needed a babysitter and often could not find one, so we rarely joined their outings. That did not go very well with them.

Then I joined their unit of the Methodist Women, but I did not fit in well. I dropped out when I was asked to start a new unit for younger adults. There were about 8 or 12 women all in their 20s and 30s, and most were stay at home moms like me. We got to know each other and even had a Halloween party. After a year they decided to join the established groups with the older women.

I was 'barefoot and pregnant' and Gary a Phillies Fan Mime for Halloween.
I had a pillow under that apron. Really. And a blond wig.

The same woman leader pressured me to befriend a woman whose interest in the church was lagging, wanting me to keep her from leaving. I would call the lady for a friendly chat but she was shy and cool. At one point I crossly told that leader it wasn’t my responsibility to keep people in the church, and that people should go to church where they felt happiest. Yep, that didn't go well either.

Gary was in charge of the youth group. The kids loved to have lock-in overnights. One night the kids were running through the church when a boy put his hand through a door window. It was a traumatic experience and the young man was changed by it, becoming more focused and dedicated to his Christian walk.

The older parishioners were very friendly to us, and Chris talked about all his ‘little white haired grandmamas’ who fussed over him and sent him birthday cards. Dorothy Lape invited us to dinner in her home. She had a WWI souvenir handkerchief her father had brought home and asked me to make a quilt with it, which she framed.

Chris

I will always remember Althea Walton. We were sitting next to each other at a women’s banquet and talked about how Nasturtium and Violets were edible. To prove our point, we each ate a flower from the centerpiece, with gleams of mischief in our eyes. Althea later gave me a memento, a jelly jar vase that belonged to her mother, and which she used to fill with Dandelions. And she gave Gary a down jacket that belonged to her husband, which he uses to this day.

On the sand dune at Warren Dunes State Park

We started camping with Chris. The first year we went to Warren Dunes State Park and the next year we went to P. J. Hoffmeister State Park, both on Lake Michigan. The first time Chris saw Lake Michigan, he went running, throwing of his clothes! He loved the beach.

On Chris's first camping trip he had an adventure he never forgot. He later dictated the story about his adventure to his preschool teacher.

After we arrived and had set up camp, Chris and Gary had gone over the sand dune to see the lake. When they returned, Chris was eager to show me all he had seen. As he ran ahead, leading the way, he slipped off the narrow path and into a dry stream bed. I couldn't reach him and had to leave him while I went back to get Gary. Gary was able to reach Chris and help him out. It was a frightening experience for a four-year-old!

Warren Dunes State Park where Chris found a hiding place

We visited cities all along the Lake Michigan shore, including Holland with it's Dutch Village and Grand Haven and the Coast Guard Museum. 

Chris and I at Holland, MI

the camper

Dad bought us a 1960s pop-up camper that had belonged to his boss at Chrysler. We kept it in the front of the house and a neighbor who was a church member complained it ruined her view. We couldn't afford the monthly fee to store it.

We invited Dad to go to New York with us, using the camper. We visited our family and our old neighbor Lucille Kuhn and saw Niagara Falls, Lockport and the Erie Canal locks, and Fort Niagara. We visited Mom's best friend, Doris at her house overlooking Lake Ontario. My Uncle Lee Becker took Chris to see the Grand Island Fire Station.

At Old Man River on the Niagara River, Tonawanda NY

Lockport, NY, an Erie Canal lock

At Ft. Niagara

Grand Island, NY Fire Station

We went to Philadelphia when Gary's first church in Morrisville had an anniversary. We saw Mark and Ellen Hostettor and took Chris to Longwood Gardens.

Gary with Mark and Ellen Hostetter at their retirement home.
Mark had been senior pastor at Gary's first charge in Morrisville, PA.

Chris and I at Longwood Gardens. Chris is in a jacket I made.

I learned my way around Hillsdale by going to garage sales. I would give Chris a few dollars to spend as he desired. He found books and toys, but also bought a wicker settee for his room and a 1950s bookcase!

Kili sleeping on Chris' wicker settee

One day when he was a tot, Chris asked to stop by the cemetery we often passed. We walked through it and he asked me to read the headstones. When we were going back to the car I asked him what he had learned. "Don't ever ever ever die," he replied.

Gary built Chris a sky fort for the back yard where there had been a garden when we moved in. We had a good garden for several years, but then the deer started eating it all, even the tomato plants!

The sky fort Gary built 

Chris adored his Pops. Dad would take him 'gallivanting' in his Dodge Ram truck.

Dad and Chris playing Shoots and Ladders

Chris had thrown over trucks for dinosaurs as his big interest. He read every book he could and became an expert. He loved to go to the Prehistoric Forest in the Irish Hills, a tourist trap built in 1963. It was closed and abandoned in 1999.

Chris went through a dinosaur craze and we often visited a dinosaur park
in the Irish Hills.

During his time in Hillsdale, Gary performed nearly 100 funerals, mostly because so few pastors would perform funerals for ‘strays’-- unchurched persons--and when the funeral parlors called he always said yes. We needed the money! One of the saddest funerals he presided over was for a man who died when his snowmobile went through the ice on Baw Beese Lake. There had been a warm spell in February, and as a police man he should have known better than to risk it. He left a bereaved wife and children.

I joined a quilt guild in Jackson, MI, Pieces and Patches. They formed in 1990 and was still quite a small guild, but a delightful group of women. I took over as newsletter editor, and using my experience went after advertisers to make the newsletter pay for itself.  When we moved I was told it took three women to replace me! We had a Christmas fabric exchange and I used the fabrics in the guild challenge to make a Christmas quilt incorporating a poem on fabric.

Christmas Challenge Quilt by Nancy A. Bekofske

We were a few hours drive from our families and they visited often, and I was often with Chris at Dad's in Clawson. Gary's folks would come for church service, especially on Easter, and Dad and my brother Tom would come for Christmas and Thanksgiving.

Dad, Chris and I at the Detroit Zoo

Gary's folks, Herman and Laura Bekofske, and Chris

Dad, Chris and Tom at Dad's house

I learned a lot about the small town mentality. A teacher friend in the quilt group was still ‘the new teacher’ in the school, and she had been there 22 years! Folks talked about the ‘so-and-so house', referencing the original or previous owner, not who lived there currently. A women told me that people needed to know how to ‘pigeon hole me’, and I did not fit in until I became a quilter. I was warned to avoid places frequented by 'those people'. And I was informed about the rumor network and it’s hub at the bank, and that gossip was a valuable commodity.

Kili keeping me company as I quilt

One adjustment to parsonage life was the feeling of insecurity. As a stay-at-home mom, without a job and living in a parsonage, I felt vulnerable. If something happened to Gary, I had thirty days to pack and find Chris and I a new place to live! And I wished we lived in town, not on the edge of town. It would have been nice for Chris to be around more children his age. All my concerns—flooding, no a.c. for our son, being isolated-- came back to me when I was told, “So, you don’t like the parsonage?”

Gary, Chris and Kili

Kili was the joy of our lives as a family. She always knew when Chris was coming home from school on the Dial-a-Ride bus, and would sit at the front door, peeking through the low window. Kids asked Chris if she was a cat. Shibas are cat-like, independent and self-contained.

Chris and Kili looking out the front door window

Kili had been crate trained and was not allowed on beds or furniture, unless we put her special quilt on first. She would sit with her chin resting on her favorite chair until we put the bed down, and she would be in the air before we had finished.

Silly Kili

After six years it felt like we had become accepted, plus I had the quilt community. When Chris received his Third Grade Bible it was a proud moment for us all.

The next day a woman from Staff Parish Relations Committee came to Gary’s office to tell him that they were requesting a new pastor. Gary was stunned. There had been no complaints, no discussion with him. He signed the paper in agreement. When the congregation heard about the request, some were incensed and wanted Gary to fight it. People were coming to me, wanting to tell me what so-and-so had said, while others stared at me to see how I was reacting. I would not listen to the gossip but knowing we were talked about behind our backs was hurtful.

Chris was having a great year. Having been jumped a grade in school the previous year, he was now socially settled in and he loved his teacher. Mr. Willoughby taught a unit on Great Lakes Shipwrecks, and Chris found a new interest, collecting and reading the many books written about the Great Lakes Shipwrecks. We kept our feelings and the church troubles hidden from Chris. We did not want him to know what was going on for fear it would turn him against church.

I knew from experience what it was like to leave the only world you knew, and it made me sad for Chris. We had to carry on for ten months, knowing we would be leaving, keeping up appearances. I broke down in the end. Knowing some people disliked us and talked about us was too hard. Plus, we knew the people behind the request had been cold and unsupportive since the beginning.

One of the quilters also turned against Gary. She had been very friendly when we were in choir together, but became cold and snippy. She was an unhappy person who turned against every friend. She felt Gary did not give her the recognition she deserved.

I made a quilt top that represented how Gary and I were experiencing these ten months, our family in crisis and isolated, surrounded by the broken church.

The quilt top I made representing the broken church

Gary’s District Superintendent had failed him. He did little to support Gary and ensure his success. He told Gary not to worry about complaints that we did not attend high school football games and the pressure for Gary to have a higher profile in town, joining the Rotary. We discovered that these were serious issues with the people who raised the issues. We just did not understand how small towns worked. A few years later, charges were brought against this D.S. and he lost his elders orders. Like my Hillsdale neighbor Nan always said, “what goes around, comes around.”

When Gary was notified that the Bishop and Cabinet had decided on where he would go next we were excited finally to be able to imagine the future. We had seriously considered leaving the ministry—again—but without a house or income and a child, we had no idea how to do that. We put ourselves in God’s hands. When we learned we would be in Lansing, MI, we were excited. We met the church and they were very warm and gracious. The parsonage was so nice and in an amazing neighborhood.

The pastor who had served in Hillsdale previous to Gary had left the ministry. I had heard some snide remarks about his wife ‘not doing anything’ or being a negligent mother because she had a home business. When we went to Lansing for the meet and greet, we met the pastor and his wife at we were to replace. They knew Hillsdale’s previous pastoral family and told me why they had left the church and parish ministry. I was amazed that we lasted seven years! Gary persevered and I just let things roll off me.

Chris and me

Dad, me, Tom, and Chris. Easter Sunday.

The church had a going away party with gifts. Gary was gifted the last quilt The Quilters had made, a Biblical Block Sampler.

Clair Booth, head of The Quilters, with Gary, Chris and I

in front of the Biblical Sampler quilt Gary received at his going away party

There were many good memories, but also hurts that we carried forward with us. The hardest part was the impact of the move on our son’s life. He did not remember any other home. I knew it would be bad. I had been through it myself. 

Nancy Juggles Being a Minister's Wife and a University Student

Me and Gary 1975. I had a 'shag' haircut.

I was still twenty-three years old when I became a full-time minister's wife in June 1975. Gary had been accepted into the Eastern Pennsylvania Conference of the United Methodist Church. His first full-time church appointment was at Morrisville United Methodist. As an Associate Pastor, Gary was in charge of Education and Youth ministires.

Morrisville, Bucks County, Pennsylvania, was one of the earliest settlements in the state. A few blocks away from the church was the Delaware River and across the bridge was Trenton, NJ. It was a lovely community.

Gary's salary of $7,400 more than doubled what we had jointly earned while at seminary! 

Our first parsonage 

We moved into the 'old' parsonage that had been designated for the senior pastor before a new parsonage for the senior pastor was built across the street. After living in a college dormitory and a two-room apartment we did not know what to do with all the space in the tri-level house!

We had a rocking chair, a record player, several hundred books, and a few bookcases. We were lucky that the parsonage was partially furnished. My folks bought a bedroom set from friends and hauled it to us. The Hostetters gave us a couch for the family room. We picked up rummage sale items, turned in Green Stamps for a lamp, and purchased a desk with a hutch.

Off the dining room was a screened-in porch. We spent most of our summer on the porch, listening to music and reading. The rest of the time, Nasturtium and I were in the family room, and I used the home office as my space for sewing. The house was surrounded by beautiful azaleas and rhododendrons.

Me and Nasturtium

That first July 4 a parish family invited us to join them for a picnic in a park. It was the kind of informal outing I had grown up with. We had our first Tastycakes and learned that out East no one knew what 'pop' was. It was 'soda' from now on!

Sid, Ellen and Mark Hostetter

Mark and Ellen Hostetter were from Pennsylvania Dutch country. This would be Mark's last pastorate before retirement. When he began his career a pastor made a few hundred dollars and was moved to a new appointment every year. Pastors would learn where they were being sent a few weeks before move-out! Mark had served across the country before returning to Pennsylvania.

Their only child, Sid, was our age and taught high school science. Summers he worked with the famous Jack Horner at his Montana dinosaur dig, and he loved spelunking. Sid's pet iguana had grown too large for his apartment so his parents kept Iggy in a huge aquarium in the parsonage. We had our litter box trained bunny. The congregation had great fun with their new ministers' strange pets!

Ellen took me to minister's wives meetings. Ellen had been a teacher when she fell for 'the reverend'. She loved being a clergy wife.

On holidays the Hostetters invited us to their home and we enjoyed Pennsylvania Dutch hospitality with seven sweets and seven sours. A few hours after gorging on dinner Ellen would serve sandwiches with the leftovers and a desert.

I found a fabric store just down the road. Also in town was a great mom and pop pizza place and a fish market where the owner helped us learn about Bluefish, Croaker, and Porgies and explained how to cook fish whole. I missed my garden fresh veggies, but we visited local farms to pick our own strawberries and peaches. We still baked our bread.

Gary and I are on the far right with the vacuum we won.
Gary and I both are wearing jackets I made.

We bought a microwave oven from Jerry Plavin's. It was large enough to cook a turkey, which we did once. When we bought the microwave we were entered into a giveaway and won a Hoover upright vacuum!

Across the street, next to the Hostetters, lived a childless Russian couple who had immigrated to America after WWII. Nadia was a teenager when she was taken to a Nazi farm as forced labor. She volunteered to go in place of her father, as he was needed to provide for the family. It appears she had been sterilized by the Nazis. After the war, she met her husband, who had also been in forced labor. They were given the choice of immigrating to Canada, the US, or South America.

Gary and I in front of the Morrisville UM Church

After Gary left for work in the morning, Nadia would rush across the street to visit with me. She asked, "why two priests" were needed at the church. And she insisted I have a child. She would tell me to ask my husband what to do to have a baby. She did not understand my plans for finishing my education. Nadia could not read, write, or drive.

Morrisville UMC

Gary had his own office with a Mr. Coffee machine. Doris Burkhardt, the church secretary, complained that he was so quiet in his rubber-soled shoes that he was always sneaking up on her. I wonder that the smell of the coffee he always had in hand didn't give him away!

Sanctuary of Morrisville UMC

Mark intended to share responsibilities with Gary, but the Staff-Parish had different expectations. They wanted Gary full time with the youth. Gary and Mark were concerned this would limit Gary's experience and preparedness for his own church.

The church had a huge youth and children's ministry that Gary was in charge of, including two youth groups, Sunday school classes, a mid-week program with a meal and Bible study, retreats, confirmation class, and a youth choir and youth musical! We loved the church youth, many of whom were my younger brother's age.

With the change in youth pastors many volunteers left and Gary had to rebuild the leadership. I helped out with the youth groups and mid-week program. I also played piano for the children's worship service on Sunday during adult worship service, sang in the choir with the youth musical, participated in Bible study classes led by Gary, and when not teaching, joined an Adult Sunday School class.

At times I came into conflict with church members. One time in Sunday School class we were discussing 'insiders who felt like outsiders' in the church and I mentioned that the youth felt that way. In particular, they wished worship was more joyful and upbeat. A youth parent scolded me saying the kids would grow up and accept tradition. And Gary was pressured to be like the last youth pastor, playing baseball with the youth. We learned how the idolization of a leader makes it difficult for their replacement who is compared instead of appreciated for the strengths that they bring.

I did not want to wait a year before returning to school and sent out applications in the fall for winter semester. My reference letters were from METHESCO professors who attested to my preparedness and participation as an auditor. 

It was very unusual for a married woman to return to school after a break in those days. Most women in their early twenties were eager to start a family.

I applied first to the University of Pennsylvania. They suggested I enroll in a special program for women returning to college, and if I succeded in it I could then apply as a regular full time student. I also applied to LaSalle University and Temple University and was accepted by both. Temple cost less, and I enrolled in classes to begin January 1976.

To commute to Temple, located in North Philadelphia, Gary drove me to the train station and I got off the train a few blocks away from campus. It was not a nice neighborhood, so I always was alert walking down that empty street. The campus was huge!

I had to juggle the role of pastor's wife and youth leader with a full college schedule. When I had breaks I spent my time feverishly sewing.

Temple University

My first semester I had Literary Criticism, which was very helpful to me as an English major. Studies in Shakespeare ended up being a Freudian approach. I loved Studies in the Victorian Age. I also had a history class on the Reformation. Professor Schwoebel broke the class into groups to research an aspect of the Reformation. We were to present what we had learned to the rest of the class using multi-media and non-lecture techniques. I was in the group studying John Calvin, but I became most interested in the Anabaptist movement. A year later I discovered that my Gochenour ancestors were Swiss Brethren, an Anabaptist group!

Gary's one year probation as a Deacon concluded with his ordination as an elder into the UMC.

Gary's ordination class June, 1976. Gary is fourth from the left.

Fall of 1976 I took The Novel from Defore to Austen, which was great. I enjoyed Modern British and American Poetry and made several friends. One was a gay Hispanic poet who told me horror stories of Catholic education in Philly. I needed a language and took Elements of Latin. The teacher said I had an odd pronunciation, and I realized I was influenced by how my choirs pronounced Latin when singing.

Spring semester 1977 I had an honors course on John Milton which required three papers; the professor really liked me and I got an A. I also had my second semester of Latin and a self-created class on writing curriculum in which I was mentored by a friend I had met in Victorian Studies class. Murray was fascinated to know a Protestant. So many of my classmates were Catholic and Jewish that I was often a novelty to them!

That fall I had Honors Topics in Religion which looked at Myth and History in the Old Testament; Studies in Drama in which we studied the first and last plays of three major playwrights; and an Honors English course on James Joyce's Ulysses for which I wrote a 50 page paper on Bloom in Nighttown from a Jungian approach, which got me an A. The professor had the class to his home for an Irish meal with Guinness Stout. I loved the course Folklore in America for which I wrote a paper on the culinary roots of American cooking. The professor encouraged me to consider grad school.

My last semester in Spring 1977 I had Colonial American History, American Indian Ethnology, Studies in Drama: Religion and Literature; and Advanced Honors Jane Austen--the class that really changed my life. The Studies in Drama was team taught with the professor who taught Myth and History. The class visited different churches, including Gloria Dei, the early Swedish church, Christ Church where our earliest Colonial ancestors worshipped, a Black Pentecostal church in North Philly, and Beth Sholom, a synagogue designed by Frank Lloyd Wright. We also had a Seder meal.

I had a poem published in the literary magazine.

Our pet rabbit adjusted to the move nicely. Nasturtium loved the large family room as 'her place', with a litter box in the utility room. I would come home and find Nasty Buns sleeping on the end table next to the couch. She would wake and run circles around my feet. If I took her outside she was terrified and crawled on my shoulder, hiding her head under my hair.

Nasturtium

When we were away Ellen would take care of Nasturtium. But the bunny would attack Ellen, nipping at her ankles. Ellen always wore a dress, nylons, and high heels so she had no protection! Ellen had to come into the house with a broom to swish Nasty Buns away! When we cared for Iggy we had no such problems!

At Christmas break, Gary and I drove back to Michigan to see our families, first stopping at Tonawanda, NY to see my Grandmother Gochenour and family. Then we drove across Canada to Gary's folks home in Grand Blanc and then down to Clawson to see my family. The second Christmas trip, we left Tonawanda and drove into a heavy snow storm. We finally pulled into a hotel and went the rest of the way home the next day. That ended our Christmas homecomings.

Our first visit back to Michigan my Grandma Ramer was living with my folks. Mom put us in the hide-a-bed in the family room, which was open to the kitchen. Gary had forgotten his PJs that year, and when we woke my Grandmother was sitting at the kitchen table, eating her toast and tea, watching us. Gary couldn't get out of bed!

Before our first anniversary, my grandmother had been set up on a blind date with Milo Fisher, a widower of 25 years. He came to the door and Grandma answered, but he said, "I am here to see your mother." He thought Grandma was my mom! Grandma was only in her early fifties. Almost a year after Grandma had caught my wedding bouquet she married Milo.

Grandma and Milo Fisher at his Birmingham home

During our time in Morrisville, we loved to take the train into Center City Philadelphia and explore the city. We walked from one end of the city to the other, looking in the huge department stores--Gimbels, Lit Brothers, John Wanamaker's with it's inner court and organ concerts, Strawbridge & Clothier-- and shopping at Reading Terminal Market where we first ate Tabouli.

We visited the Philadelphia Art Museum and stood in line on Friday afternoons for cheap seats in the 'nosebleed gallery' to see Eugene Ormandy and the Philadelphia Orchestra.

1776 musical program

The Bicentennial celebration in Philadelphia was exciting. We saw the musical 1776 for free. We visited the historical museums and Independence Hall.

1776 musical stage on Independence Mall

A new museum for Benjamin Franklin opened, and we visited his grave. We saw the Rodin Museum and I often went to the Free Library. There was the Edgar Allen Poe house, Betsey Ross House, and Elfreth Alley. At Head House Square's New Market we saw vendors selling crafts, including miniature quilts. I loved to have ice cream at Once Upon a Porch in Society Hill; the restaurant decor included porches were customer enjoyed their ice cream.

On the Fourth of July, we went downtown to see the fireworks and free concerts. One year we saw the Beach Boys perform on the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art.

On Christmas Day we went to Washington Crossing State Park and saw a reenactment of Washington Crossing the Delaware.

Reenactment of Washington crossing the Delaware

Reenactment of Washington Crossing the Delaware

We visited the Bowman's Hill Wildflower Preserve and learned to identify Eastern wildflowers. We drove to Princeton, NJ, passing cranberry farms, to visit an antique and used book shop. Our first trip to New York City we took a bag lunch which we ate in Central Park, then we saw The Fantasticks. We also saw Yentl, visited the Cooper-Hewitt Museum, the Metropolitan Museum of Art, and the Modern Museum of Art.

The youth group made trips to Asbury Park on the Jersey Shore and the Hostetters took us on day trips to Cape May and Ocean Grove. The Hostetters took us to Lancaster, County where we enjoyed family style meals.

The craft revival was in full swing during the Bicentennial. Gary and I took macrame classes and made hanging plant holders. I tried my hand at needlepoint, hooked rug making, and Crewel embroidery.

Gary and I in the Morrisville parsonage back yard, 1977

Our second year at Morrisville I wrote elementary school curriculum for Vacation Bible School with an ecology theme. Gary and I also helped create the church's first elementary school age retreat.

We had joined several small groups. One group met monthly for a world food dinner. The other was a support group. A man in that group was involved in Serendipity small group training and we took the training.

For summer vacation we went camping. We intended to go to Nova Scotia but fell in love with Acadia National Park in Maine. We made it to the Bay of Fundy. We saw the tide come in. But we also got soaking wet and spent a night in motel room drying out. Then we turned back for Maine.

Mark Hostetter suggested that Gary should not stay an associate too long. Gary let it be known to the District Superintendent that if the 'right church' came up he was willing to make a move. The Cabinet contacted him about going to a church in Darby, PA and Gary accepted.

It was a sad day when we left the great youth we had come to know and love, and the wonderful friends we had made.

After two years in Morrisville, we were moving again. I was 25 years old. We had no idea that two pastors had already turned down the Darby appointment.