Holy Week. When the enemies have decided to gather at the gate. Attack is on. I think I will stay home. Someone should stay battle-scar-free. To care for the wounded. ~ April 16, 2014
Six years ago, I wrote that on my Facebook timeline. A few months later my husband retired after spending over 30 years of his 38-year career as a parish minister.
We are different people now. I can be outspoken when I want to be, although diplomatic phrasing of my opinion has become a force of habit. Our home is a private sanctuary without yearly walk-through inspections and we can repair and upgrade without trustee approval. We are not required to attend social gatherings or bring a casserole to potluck dinners.
Our roles had run our lives. And my husband bore the weight of hundreds of souls, and the bickering and power plays, the groupies and the critics.
It is a life that few write about realistically. The narrative is dominated by idealized, charming stories and cult horror memoirs.
"A minister," she said. "It seems useful, doesn't it? It seems like a pleasant way to spend a day."~from The Dearly Beloved by Cara Wall
I was interested in reading
The Dearly Beloved by Cara Wall when I learned it concerned the relationship between two pastors and their wives.
Wall's characters come from different backgrounds and experiences.
There is the scholarly Charles who accidentally stumbles upon faith and holds it without question. Suffering a devastating loss, Lily angrily rejects the idea of God or 'a plan,' and the reliability of happiness rooted in others. Charles pursues Lily, in spite of her rejection.
There was only circumstance and coincidence. Life was random, neutral, full of accidents...the prerequisite for love was trust; and Lily did not trust anything. ~from The Dearly Beloved by Cara Wall
Nan is a Pastor's Kid with a naive and untested faith. James escapes his dysfunctional environment with a scholarship to university. His interest in Nan brings him to church. He struggles to believe while embracing the pastoral call as a vehicle to address societal problems.
"I may not believe in God, but I believe in ministry." ~James in The Dearly Beloved by Cara Wall
Charles and James represent the pastoral and the prophetic roles and are hired by Third Presbyterian Church in a coministry. They balance each other. When parishioners complain that James was "asking us to change views we've held all our lives," Charles replys, "That's what you hired him to do."
The wives are a different story. Lily pursues a PhD and academic career and leaves the traditional, constricted role of pastor's wife to Nan. Their differences are further shown when Nan is devastated by miscarriages and Lily struggles with an unwanted pregnancy--twins.
One of the twins is born with autism, leading Charles to depression while Lily crusades to find the best life for her son. James steps up with a life-changing idea.
The couples become a remarkable community, learning from each other and changing each other. Their story is a microcosm of how the church should work.
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There was only one call. They were, the four of them, married to each other, in a strange way.~ from The Dearly Beloved by Cara Wall
Casey Cep's review in the New York Times wrote, "Rather than seeming like two ministers, James and Charles sometimes read as if the pastoral teachings of
Henri Nouwen and the political theology of
Reinhold Niebuhr were fighting for control of one parish..."
I was intrigued by the identification of the characters with the theologians Nouwen and Niebuhr, both of whom I have read.
But I did not see Charles and James as 'fighting' for control as much as the parishioners splitting over their differing messages and styles.
In our experience in the itinerant ministry, where pastors with differing styles follow each other, some section of the parish will reject the incoming pastor for not being the previous pastor. Humans have a preference for leaders who align with their set of personal beliefs and reject those who offer a different perspective.
I have known pastors like James. We joined the Methodist Federation for Social Action in the mid-1970s. Some pastors took controversial actions. Ending the nuclear arms race was an important issue at the time and people were chaining themselves to the gates in protest. Men who became pastors during Vietnam and the Civil Rights era carried their message throughout their career, even when the church had become more conservative politically and religiously, resulting in rejection.
I do not agree with Cep when she writes, "Instead of discussing soteriology or theodicy or even Jesus, they talk in the blanched terms of bad things and good people, even with one another."
Sure, at seminary classes we talked about soteriology and eschatology and all the other 'ologies'. (I audited six classes over three years.) But real-life pastoral ministry is about leadership, team building, financial planning, budgeting, pastoral care, listening, crisis management, and the nuts and bolts of running a nonprofit organization run by volunteers. People want answers to real life issues not theology talks. Like why does God allow bad things to happen to good people.
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I had to wonder how Wall came to understand the 'inside story' of ministry.
In an article, I learned that Wall’s small town, Nazarene, parents moved to New York City where they became a part of the
First Presbyterian Church, the model for the church in her novel. The church had a history: it was here that Rev.
Harry Emerson Fosdick's radical ideas riled dissent and led to his resignation. He moved on to Riverside Church.
First Presbyterian had two ministers. “The ministers I grew up with at First Presbyterian were very dynamic and charismatic,” Wall says. “We were close to them."
Learn more about the novel
here, where you can listen to an excerpt and hear Walls speak about her novel.
I purchased an ebook.